I didn’t have a watershed moment that made me change everything. Perhaps others experience those defining, line-in-the-sand moments when inspiration creates massive changes in their lives but I don’t have that kind of a story. And maybe you don’t have that story either.
My story is that I’m a working mom of three who deeply needed change. I wanted to change the life/work “thing.” While I did the best I could with the knowledge I had, it led me to a life of overwhelm, stress, regret, and frustration. As I looked around at dear friends pulling the same long hours and running to the same kids’ activities with the same results, I realized I needed to chart a different path. Maybe that’s why you’re here – searching for a better path.
From my place of frustration and stress several years ago, this blog was born. I trademarked “Having What Matters” long before the simplicity and minimalism movements were really chugging along in earnest (and certainly before I knew it existed, though there were some trailblazers out there!) “Having What Matters” was a phrase that came to me when I was mulling over the implications of the proverbial question of “Having It All.” I wondered, “Maybe it’s not about having it all, but about Having What Matters.”
I began reading, experimenting, decluttering, simplifying, streamlining, and trying to align what mattered to me as a professional working mom with my personal life experience.
And it’s still messy some days. And hard. (Okay, let’s be real, darn near impossible.)
That’s why I couldn’t find resources and thought-leaders geared toward working moms of older kids with dual-income families, messy teenage rooms, an overfull calendar, and children who were about as compliant as they were as toddlers.
When I would talk with other women — mothers or those without children alike — about their lives, their careers, and what really mattered to them, it gave me so much joy to share a bit about my journey! In my continuing process, I had found tips, decisions, life hacks that worked for me (and plenty that didn’t) and how to find hope when you feel like you are digging out of a deep, dark pit of your own creation.
If you are familiar with the dark pit of overwhelm, you are in the right space. I’ve been there too and have found a hard-earned pathway out.
You see, you and I live in a society where we’re told that the only way to be happy is to do more, have more, and be more. That’s a recipe for disaster, but it’s all we know. And it’s what we feel we need to do to be “successful.”
But it simply isn’t true.
I believe simplicity is possible for women who want both a fulfilling career and a meaningful personal life – to intentionally “own” their lives and focus on what really matters to them.
So this marks my line in the sand, although I started dragging my toe on the beach a long time ago.
I have two main goals for this blog:
- To curate and share what I’ve learned so far. I’ve been researching, following, experimenting, and fumbling around with simplicity, minimalism, work/life balance, and all sorts of personal and professional development material for a long time. I want to share it with you, so you can skip some of the bumps I’ve had along the way.
- To show you what the process of simplifying looks like in a dual-income, busy household of five people with two working parents, three middle-schoolers, and a slew of extracurriculars and commitments for all five of us. We have a long way to go, but we’ve started and can look back at the important changes that have come already. As a professional, ambitious woman, I want to enjoy and build a home that is a haven for those myself and those I love; I’ll share my joys and challenges, my ups and downs, what has worked and what has failed.
Let’s walk this walk together. It won’t feel easy at times. It will bring up some big questions about who we are deep down and what kind of life we want and why. There will be tough conversations with our loved ones and co-workers. It may feel like two steps forward, one step back some days, but in the end, it will be worth it. An intentionally crafted life is always worth it. I want you to know that your journey matters!
So feel free to dive right into the blog and watch for more valuable resources coming soon. We are hiking through rugged territory, but we can hike together. Who’s bringing the snacks?